What is Mom Guilt? Overcome Mom Guilt with 10 Proven Tips

Are you feeling like you're missing out on something? Sometimes it is like you are running out of time, sometimes you feel you are not doing enough. The fear of every mother is not being able to give enough to her children. The consistent pressure of trying to be a perfect mom often leads to disappointments and exhaustion. The guilty feeling chips away at her self-confidence, leaving her stuck in self-doubt.  Mom guilt is a silent cry every mom faces when managing her motherhood. 

This article will shed light on mom guilt, its causes, and some proven tips from experts on how to overcome mom guilt. Let's dive deep to know more about it. 

What is Mom Guilt?

Understanding a mom's guilt is like a nagging feeling, or self-criticism, that you are not doing enough. A feeling that your kids deserve a better mom. İt is a feeling of insufficient living standards set by your surroundings. These people might be your relatives, friends, family, or even yourself.

Being a conscious parent puts you on the path of learning and discovering new things every day. You face challenges, and it is common for every responsible mom to have self-doubts. But these guilt feelings are not a good partner in parenting. The question arises: Does mom guilt ever go away? To find the answer, let's first look into the causes that generate mom’s guilt.

Causes of Mom Guilt

Mothers may feel guilty for many reasons, for example, managing work-life and parenting together. 

Let's have a look at some of the main causes of mom guilt feelings.

1. Aggressive Behavior 

Turning angry at your children unnecessarily can express guilt feelings in moms. Sometimes mothers abuse their children physically, verbally, or emotionally by showing aggression. This can result in post depression ending in feelings of guilt.

2. Pursuing Career Mom Guilt

A working mother finds it difficult to balance work and motherhood. Sometimes you have to stay away from the family to give your work proper time. İt may cause a feeling of not giving proper time to your kids when they need you the most. It results in communication gaps between the mother and her children. This reason can be prolonged, and nobody knows how long it takes working mom guilt  to go away.

3. Comparison between Children 

Parenting more than one child has a variable experience, and moms start comparing one child to the other, resulting in stress and guilt in both. To overcome this, a mom should give equal time and value to each child.

4. Meeting Society’s Expectations 

A lot of mothers think they don't meet the requirements of a “perfect” mom. They feel depressed by comparing themselves with the super moms they see in the media or their surroundings.

Now let’s talk about how to deal with mom guilt.

10 Tips to Overcome Mom Guilt

When you take good care of yourself, you can protect your children in a better way. We have summed up the best tips from experts and mental coaches to overcome mom guilt effectively. Have a look at these amazing tips:

1. Ask for Help from Experts

A mother faces physical and emotional trauma after giving birth to her child. No one can read her mind to know what she is facing. İn this situation, there is a need for proper communication. A mother should speak clearly and ask for help from possible sources near her. 

Discussion with peers and senior moms can give better solutions to the problems she is going through.

2. Know Your People 

İt is very important to be aware of the people who really care for you. When you are in despair, you need proper guidance and affection to overcome the hardship. A real companion, whether it be your best friend, mom, relative, or any other family member, can help you overcome it. 

3. Lowering Your Expectations 

Expectations lead to disappointment most of the time. When we begin to ignore the negativity around us and behave well to others every time, we start ignoring ourselves. This negligence of self and trying to be a “perfect” mom all the time leads to disappointments. 

Try to expect less from yourself. You are a human; you can get exhausted often. Prioritize your mental peace first.

4. Get a Helping Hand

Dealing with household chores and managing motherhood can be hectic daily. İf you need some sort of helping hand,try hiring someone to assist with household chores and responsibilities, if that is in your budget.  And if not, take a good look at your budget and see if there is wiggle room to hire someone.  Maybe you have a neighborhood friend or teenager looking to make a little extra money.

İf you are a working mom, you definitely need a lot of help, either from your spouse, a nanny or cleaning service. İt not only reduces your burden but also helps in lowering your mental stress.

5. Make a Routine

A mismanaged life can lead to more stress and feelings of guilt. A proper schedule can help manage all the tasks on time and may help you lower depression. İt gives you relaxation and a sense of completion of tasks.

6. Be Thankful 

Recalling your blessings before sleeping can give you happiness. You will start to notice the good around you, and these blessings will make you practice gratitude.

7. Understanding the Source of Guilt

Knowing the real cause of guilt can help you identify your weaknesses and overcome them. You need to ask yourself:  Where is this mom guilt coming from?

Sometimes there are such people around you who expect more from you, leading to stress and guilt. Avoiding them is necessary for your peace of mind.

8. Controlling Your Thoughts

İrrational thoughts can steal your happiness. Try to avoid unnecessary thoughts and stop worrying about what people will think about your parenthood.

9. Be a Good Listener

Always listen to and believe in your children. A trustworthy relationship can do wonders. Your children can increase your self-esteem and give you a sense of protection.

10. Be the Parent You Wanted in Your Childhood

An ideal parent is someone who admires their children, makes them feel safe and supported, and manages their mom guilt in a healthy way.  Building a friendly, open relationship with your children can help ease mom guilt.

Wrap Up

Dealing with mom guilt is a very common behavior in parenting. It is totally normal to feel mom guilt, and you can easily manage it. İf you identify the root of guilt, you will be able to overcome it. To ease mom guilt, it’s important for mothers to stay in tune with their emotions, parent with patience and fairness, and find a healthy balance between work and family life, especially for career-driven moms. Letting go of unrealistic societal expectations is also key to finding peace of mind.

If you’re a mom struggling with guilt for any reason, start by understanding what mom guilt really is and explore practical tips like the ones we’ve shared here to help release those heavy feelings.

I’d love to hear from you, let me know in the comments if these tips resonate with you or if you’ve found other ways to ease mom guilt in your life!