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The Joy We Almost Miss
The other day my daughter asked if we could stop at Starbucks.
Now, there are probably plenty of reasons I should say no to spending an unreasonable amount of money on a drink that will disappear in about 20 minutes. 😂
But she's 15.
And if you've ever had a 15-year-old, you know that an invitation to go anywhere together isn't something you overthink.
So... Starbucks it is.
And honestly, it's not even the drink I care about. It's the car ride. It's hearing what's going on at school, who said what, what's funny, what's annoying, and all the little pieces of her life that I don't get quite as freely as I did when she was younger.
I'll gladly pay $10 for that.
It got me thinking about something I've been spending a lot of time with lately... joy.
Joy is one of the four areas I've been exploring while developing my Creating a Life You Love seasonal visualization series, along with Health & Vitality, Purpose, and Possibility.
And I think I used to picture joy as something bigger. A vacation, a celebration, a really exciting opportunity…something you plan for or look forward to. But the older I get, the more I'm realizing that some of my favorite moments aren't big at all.
They're actually pretty ordinary.
Joy is my morning walk by the beach. It's where most of my Mid-Week Exhale videos come from. I'll be walking along, see the sun hitting the water or hear the waves and thinking how peaceful it is... knowing that someone else might also need 15 seconds of this today.
Joy is listening to my son tell me about his adventures at his first full-time HVAC job. He's out there building a life of his own now, and I genuinely love hearing his stories when he comes home.
Joy is Bruce curled up close by. He's definitely NOT a lap dog. Apparently those short, stubby legs require a surprising amount of personal space. 😂 But he does like to be near us, and that's good enough for me.
Joy is time with my mom and sister in true trifecta fashion. It's a text from a friend I haven't talked to in far too long. It's the smell of brownies... and even more joy when they're super gooey.
It's a sunrise. A sunset. Or, as we head deeper into New England fall, a storm outside while I'm warm and cozy inside.
And here's one I didn't necessarily see coming…
Joy is hanging out with my husband again.
For so many years, our lives revolved around the kids. Practices, games, school, rides, appointments, meals... and approximately 8,000 conversations about who needed to be where and when.
Now they're getting older. They don't need us in quite the same way.
And if I'm being completely truthful, sometimes that breaks my heart a little.
I miss parts of those years already. But I'm also discovering something on the other side of it.
There's joy here too.
There's joy in getting to know the young adults my kids are becoming. There's joy in hearing about lives that are beginning to expand beyond ours. And there's joy in looking over at the person I've been raising them with and realizing...
Oh, hi. It's you again. 😂
Maybe that's part of this season too. Not trying to hold onto every version of life we've loved... but noticing the joy in the version we're living now.
Something to Think About
I think we sometimes treat joy like something we need to create through circumstances...
I'll be happier when things settle down.
When I have more time.
When work isn't so busy.
When we take the trip.
When I reach the goal.
When everyone stops needing something from me for FIVE MINUTES. 😂
But maybe joy isn't waiting for us on the other side of any of that.
Maybe a lot of it is already here.
The tricky part is that the things demanding our attention are usually much louder.
The unanswered email. The laundry. The appointment we forgot to make. The bill. The thing we need at the grocery store. The 55 tabs running through our heads at any given moment.
Joy doesn't usually yell that loudly.
We have to notice it.
And that's the little practice I've been playing with lately.
When something feels good, I try to actually let myself be there for it.
This is nice.
I love this.
I'm happy right now.
That's it.
I'm not adding another practice to my morning routine or starting a gratitude journal with 24 prompts.
I'm just trying to catch myself in the moments I don't want to miss.
And simply making enough room to notice what's already there.
A Little Reminder from Me to You…
Joy doesn't have to be grand to count.
Sometimes it's a walk by the water, a conversation in the car, a text from an old friend, a gooey brownie, or someone you love sitting close enough to remind you they're there.
Joy doesn't need to be grand. It just needs to be noticed.
— Amanda 🤍
Want to create a little space for more joy, calm, and possibility?
I'm hosting a Fall Into Possibility guided visualization. It's a relaxing hour to slow down, step away from the mental noise and reconnect with what you'd love to create more of in your life this season.
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